Freaking out and need to vent!!

Okay, so last weekend Shane and I went up to Santa Maria so I could finally meet his mother. Which went well, but that's not why I'm posting.
If anyone is familier with the Central California Coast, you will know that Santa Maria is famous for two things, the last Michael Jackson molestation trial and really GREAT wine (which would account for Jacko getting off, cause the jury HAD to be drunk, but that's a WHOLE other story!!)
Anyways... we had an absolutly WONDERFUL time. (in SO many different ways). But here we are a week later and my period is 4 days late!!!
So I'm kinda starting to freak out. I know I'm overreacting, I've been on birth control since I was 16, and I took emergency contreception. (1st time I've EVER had sex without a condom! and I missed one of my pills earlier this month). Just really really freaking out! I can usually set my watch by my "schedual"! I'm only 28, I'm too young to have kids!!!

I was going to offer advice, but then realized that you're on the pill, so you're not ovulating regularly anyhow...so I'm sorry, can't help.

I can really relate to you right now though....mine's late too and I had to do a morning after pill which has likely messed it up. I just want my period to start so I can quit worrying - Dr said it could take another couple weeks.

I hope you get it soon. Do you have any of your normal PMS symptoms? Keep us posted.

Mouse...yeah, it can start right after, or you can spot, or you can get nothing. I got a "sort of period/spotting" for 5 days but no cramps etc. I've been waiting for my "real" period to start just to be sure everything's ok.

And yep...28 is too young for kids if you're not ready. I'm 29 and that's too young for me!

Wow, I don't blame you for freaking out! ((((((HUGS)))))

Even though you missed that one pill (btw do you know that if you miss one, you're supposed to "double up" the next day?), I still think you're probably not pregnant. First, you took emergency contraception. Second, if your period was due 4 days ago and the unprotected sex was 7 days ago (i.e. 3 days before your period), for you to be pregnant now means you had to have ovulated less than 7 days before your period was to start, which seems highly unlikely. Even if your pills didn't work, most women ovulate at least 10 days before their period starts (the normal range is 10-16 days). The egg only lives for 12-24 hours, so if there's no sperm to fertilize it during that time, pregnancy is impossible. Also, there may be other reasons why your period is late--unusual stress, illness, etc.--though that does seem strange since you're on the pill. Anyway, bottom line is:

1) you're probably not pregnant;
2) if you ARE pregnant, conception probably occurred BEFORE last weekend (do you remember when you missed your pill?)

Unfortunately, the only way to confirm a pregnancy is to take a pregnancy test, and it's too soon right now to get accurate results. Sit tight for a few more days and hang in there!

emzak- I did double up, and I'm sure it's nothing. But I tend to overreact anyways.

Annie- You're right! 28, 29 it's TOO YOUNG! I think once I'm ABD (all but disertation) on my PhD then I might be ready for kids. (that's about 5 years from now!)

Well, overreacting or not, this stuff is scary! Feel free to vent as much as you need.

P.S. Does your bf know?

Yeah, Shane knows! I couldn't look at him and not tell him.
He agrees that it's probably nothing, but is very supportive. He said "well it might be a little ahead of schedual, but that's okay."
I think he wants kids, but he has issues over his own mortality, and thinks that it might not be fair to leave me a widow with kids to raise!
(his health is great for a 51 year old!)
From what I've gathered he's had two girlfriends who have gotten pregnant (one in high school and one about 7 years ago) both had abortions.

I'm so glad to hear Shane is being supportive. That will make the wait a little easier. He sounds like a real sweetie. :)

Mouse- I may sound like I'm nitpicking, but I always planned to get married at 30 (Shane and I are looking at September of next year, a month after I turn 30 and he turns 53) and then kids at 32 (he'll be 55).
Ordinarily, this being moved up a couple of years wouldn't seem like a big deal.
Here's the problem Shane doesn't make much money (works on campus and then as a caretaker for a disabled woman).
I was teaching US govt at a private school, but that was only for the semester and that ended on Friday. So I'm unemployed for the time being and both of us are real close to finishing our Master's degrees

Regardless of what Shane and I want, we simply can't afford a baby right now!!

Mouse~~~:( I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be rude!! :(

As far as being too young...it's a matter of who you are and where you are and what you want... My aunt married at 18 and had 4 of her 5 kids by the time she was 24... I am 24 and definitely think i am too young at this point to start breeding!


Anyway... I am on the pill... I have been for about a year and a half, and we haven't used condoms at all in this time. I have missed a few pills here and there... I have also missed periods... sometimes i have been late, sometimes i didnt get it at ALL.

Before I got on the pill, sometimes I would go 3 months without a period... the pill has really not made my periods much more regular...

And I was never pregnant. The moral of this story is not that you are not pregnant. You could be, but definitely not necessarily.

Dang girls


Here comes MOMMA Nessa....

and chill cause i am old enough to be your momma....


1. stress makes your period late
2. worrying makes you stressed
3. i was one year away from my first divorce at 28 with 2 kids...


and finally if you want God ot laugh tell him/her your plans...

go to the drug store and buy a HIGH QUALITY Pregnancy TEST and POAS (PEE ON THE STICK)


then figure out what your gonna do...

stop freaking out and be a grown up... if your pregnant and you don't want to be pregnant then will you a. have an abortion, b. give the baby up for adoption or c. suck it up and have a child that was not planned but is probably very wanted?


my periods did NOT get regular until I was into peri-menopause and only then did i become regular.... NOT EVEN ON THE PILL back in the Jurassic error.

I know i'm cold
I know I'm hard

but i speak the truth.....

Yep. Get a test.

You know, I have to say this... NO ONE is EVER ready for a baby. My life was derailed at 23 when I got pregnant in my last semester of college with my son. Guess what??? Life goes on!!!

In fact... it gets better, richer, more wonderful than you can comprehend. Stop stressing, no matter what. Get a test. Pee on it. LOL. Get your results!

It's not the end of the world and you CAN continue school and work and all that jazz and still have time for the child if you are. Really, if I can do it at 23, you sure as hell can at 28.

~phos

You know, I have to say this... NO ONE is EVER ready for a baby.

I definitely agree with this. My husband and I are TRYING for a baby, and I still don't feel ready! Well, actually I go back and forth. Some days I want a baby so bad I could cry; and others I freak out and think what the hell am I doing??? :D

The other ladies are right. Get a pregnancy test first, THEN freak out--or not. Chances are you're not pregnant anyway, but if you are, you guys will figure something out and we'll be here for you!

(((HUGS)))

I completely understand freaking out over being late. I'm currently 2 weeks late and sometimes that really causing me to freak out as I'm only 20 and only a sophmore in college. However, as my hubby told me, I'm probably not pregnant and neither are you. Besides, at this point, freaking out doesnt do any good. If you are pregnant, freaking out doesnt change anything. If your not, then your freaking out for no good reason and just creating a stressful week. Things will work out like they are supposed to, just get a test.

i really think those women that freak out and say they aer not ready make the best moms....

chikygrl13, I would definitely TEST...then you will know and won't stress anymore than you already have ((((((hugs))))))))

EmZak, I know what you mean about being back and fourth, I have never brought this up with Griffin because I don't want him to freak. When we first started trying I would be late every month....probably because there was so much build up and excitement. I thought it would just magically happen...and here we are a year and a half later.
Now that we have started with the specialist and it's more real and closer than ever... I get scared???:eek:
I mean, maybe it's normal...and maybe it's the twin factor...worrying about all of the risks involved with that??? and hoping we're making the best choices:)
I'm glad we are both TTC at the same time so we can chat

I know!!! And now I'm hypervigilant about everything I put into my mouth. Vitamins, fruits and veggies, complex carbs. No caffeine, alcohol, and sushi with raw fish (that's the hardest part :( ). I know it's dumb but they try to scare you so much these days--I don't know what's fact and what's fiction anymore. I have to keep reminding myself that GENERATIONS of women have had healthy babies without the benefit of all the latest medical/health "knowledge" :rolleyes: but it's still kinda scary.

Thank you all for letting me vent!
I know I was overreacting.
The good news is...
I'm NOT Pregnant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(I swear I have never been so happy to get my period!!)

The interesting thing is, Shane is disappointed!!!
But it's all for the best (and he knows it too!) we need to finish school and both have decent JOBS so we can AFFORD a child!!!
(which we can't right now)

But thank you all for your advice and help and just for letting me vent!

This is a little off topic...

But I've decided that when/if I have kids....when I'm pregnant...I'm not giving up anything.

I already don't smoke or drink...so obviously I won't be doing that...or any drugs...duh.

But as for the other stuff. I'm not giving it up. I'm going to continue with my Dr. Pepper....blue cheese dressing...Aleve...and anything else they tell me is bad.

My mom did all of that stuff....and I turned out Fine! :D
(ok...so i'm a little screwed up...but my sister is fine! lol!)

Nadine.

ok ladies 46 years ago next month I was born....

here's a TRUE story from my dear mom

"we had just moved into the apartment and I was sitting on a beach chair. I had my legs up I was VERY pregnant with you... I had the big heavy glass ashtray resting on my stomach (while she smoked her latest cigarette)....

YOU KICKED the ashtray off my stomach and sent it flying ... full of ashes and cigarette butts..."


and i was 7 1/2 pounds... and screaming healthy....

:eek: ROFLAO!!! That's hilarious, Nessa!

My Mom smoked 2 packs a day with me, too, and I was the healthiest of her kids at a whopping 8lbs 10oz. She smoked more with me because she had a PSYCHO neighbor where they were living at the time in PA who abused his wife and 11 year old daughter. She'd sit in her living room, staring at that house, smoking ciggies and reading The Exorcist with a can of hairspray by her side in case he came over to kill her (she was convinced he was going to do just that!)

Anyway, after they moved to MA (the last month or so of her pregnancy with me) she heard through a neighbor friend that the man DID end up killing his wife and throwing his daughter through the plate glass window shortly after they moved. :eek: That, of course, kept my mom smoking 2 packs a day until AFTER I was born.

*shrug*
~phos

She'd sit in her living room, staring at that house, smoking ciggies and reading The Exorcist with a can of hairspray by her side in case he came over to kill her (she was convinced he was going to do just that!)

Extreme hold hairspray, then, I take it? :p

The good news is...
I'm NOT Pregnant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woo-hoo! I'm glad you got the news you were hoping for. :)

I was just about to apologize for turning your thread from "Oh my god, I'm scared I might be pregnant!!!" into "Oh my god, how the heck do I get pregnant???" :p